Created by Emma K. Viglucci, M.A., LMFT, CFT Marriage and Family Therapist, Writer and Speaker Relationship Success Expert: Assists Couples Succeed at their Relationship Founder of Metropolitan Marriage & Family Therapy, PLLC http://www.metrorelationship.com Call us at 212-537-9055, 888-880-9055, or Click Here |
It is very easy to make excuses for our shortcomings and to blame our circumstances and others for the dissatisfaction we experience. In fact it is so easy, that this is our default MO. Why are we disowning our self? Why are we giving our power away? It is time to reclaim your self. It is time to show up in your relationship and your life. It is time to stop giving your power away and start using it to create the relationship and life you want. Yes, this is easier said than done, but not impossible. Get to it! You can do this by: 1) Not reacting to your surroundings and the people in your life. Take a step back and gain perspective.
2) Monitor your feelings and moderate them to your situation - exaggerated or minimized feelings are reactive, not responsive, promoting more dissatisfaction.
3) Stop worrying about what your partner is doing or not doing, and focus on your investment instead.
4) Stop trying to please, doing always what is expected of you, caretaking for everyone, imposing unrealistic expectations on yourself and others, trying to be perfect, and worrying about others' impressions of you.
5) Clearly express realistic expectations of others and allow them to meet them.
6) Appropriately communicate your needs and go about having them met.
7) Flexibly hold on to your views and convictions and carry yourself accordingly.
8) Don't tell others how to feel, what to think or what to do - doing so takes their power away disabling them from bringing their authentic and beautiful self to you!
9) Let go of outcomes. Live and enjoy the moment.
10) Give from the heart - no strings attached.
Stop de-selfing your self, stop the co-dependency today. Own your self and start moving forward in your relationship and your life!
Note: Our Top 10s, including those written by other professionals, provide insights and resources for individuals and couples at all levels of satisfaction in their life and relationship. They assist individuals and couples enhance their life, relationship, maintain changes, and nurture the relationship and themselves. The content of the Top 10s is just food for thought, a source of inspiration and ideas, and a resource. It is not intended in anyway to be therapeutic or a substitute for professional assistance. Refer to our full "Disclaimer and Conditions of Use" at the bottom of this page. If you believe you require further assistance than is provided here, please hire a Couple Therapist or other relevant professional. We specialize in working with Couples - contact us at 212-537-9055 or Click Here.
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Top 10's 